Rupert Pupkin Speaks: "Bad" Movies We Love Guest Post: Moe Porne ""

Monday, August 13, 2012

"Bad" Movies We Love Guest Post: Moe Porne

Moe runs the Drunk On Vhs Podcast and is a co-host of the No-Budget Nightmares Podcast(along with Doug Tilley).
Things Moe Porne Likes:
Something Weird Video
Hosting the No-Budget Nightmares Podcast (w/ Doug Tilley)
Pipe Smoking
His Kids
Writing Lists
and Thick, yet Flexible Women

Things Moe Porne dislikes:
Writing about himself
When People Don't Follow Him on Twitter (@DrunkonVHS)

11 - Chrome Soldiers (1992) - Gary Busey suffers from Gulf War Syndrome....on a hog. This indomitably slow film has a soft spot in my heart, as does any film smart enough to through Busey and Yaphet Kotto together

10 - Hellfire (1984) - TV's Sledgehammer finds out that God has a nice ass and a sultry voice...and she's PISSED. If this were feature length I'd have torn my hair out, but it's 30 minutes of ridiculous (and incredibly pointless) televangelism

9 - Zipperface (1992) - An S&M serial killer with a penchant for gimp masks and studs slices up models because his wife is overbearing (seriously)! Zipperface is the least competent murderer ever, but who doesn't love a gimp mask.

8 - Disorderlies (1987) - The Fat Boys take care of an old man....hilarity ensues
*watch it on Netflix Instant:

7 - The Toughest Man in the World (1984) - Mr. T runs through a I really need to say anything else?

6 - Splitz (1984) - a mediocre manager gets his all girl band from slightly above nothing. This is a poorly acted film with an amazing soundtrack and one of the best impromptu luncheonette dance sequences of all time, plus strip basketball.

5 - Pizza Man (1991) - Bill Maher in 30 minutes or less....sadly the movie doesn't follow the same rules. I'm still not so sure why I love this flick, but I do.

 4 - Maniac Warriors (1988) (aka Empire of Ash, aka Empire of Ash II) - Three words - Rocket Launcher Hats (here's my review

3 - Abraxas, Guardian of the Universe (1990) - Jesse "The Mind" Ventura beats up Sven Ole-Thorson on an intergalactic scale, with a special appearance by Mr. Destiny himself, Jim Belushi. I've been told recently that the Rifftrax guys riffed this flick something good, but I'll stick to the original. This is one of the movies that got me into watching this kind of junk....and LOVING IT!.

2 - Fireback (1983) - Seriously one of the best guns ever put to film, but it's on screen for approx 3 minutes....thankfully the rest of the film is packed with painful looking and probably illegal Philippino stunts and explosions.

1 - Mala Voodoo (1986) - An urban "comedy" about a woman (Mala) who contrives a way to get the man of her dreams (a piece of shit womanizer) using the power of VOODOO! though if I'm telling the truth, I don't love this movie, but I want more people to find it and watch it so I can bitch about how bad it is with them... 

Honorable No-Budget Nightmares mentions:

1 comment:

Ty said...

Haha! Great choices!

Zipperface and Maniac Warriors are classics.